Fact: There are some real nasty trolls on the internet. Eliza and Chris discuss the online harassment she and many others have to go through as an Asian woman blogger.
The following are edited excerpts from “Shut Up, You Dyed Your Hair Blonde!”, the 4th episode of Plan A’s podcast, Escape From Plan A.
In one of our previous podcasts, Teen, Jess, and I talked a lot about my alt-right article, and we talked critically of certain types of internet Asian liberal feminist writers. And I thought to be fair, we should also talk about what I think causes a lot of that, which is Asian guys on the internet who harass these people.
When it comes to white male/Asian female relationships, many Asian guys want the Asian female to understand and speak up about issues in the Asian American community, especially the ones that concern Asian males. But when someone does, they’re still mad.
If you look at the traditional feminist narrative, it’s so centered on whiteness and correctly predicated on the idea of white male dominance. But when it comes to Asian Americans, for sure there are aspects of patriarchy in Asian and Asian American culture. But the Asian Man is also the Feminized Man and to what extent does he have and not have male privilege? And we are totally unable to talk about that because we don’t have the language or concepts.
I think that when an Asian woman says something sympathetic or questions something or wants to have an honest dialogue and is seeking insight, it sounds like common sense, but don’t start off with the assumption that she’s self-hating, that she doesn’t respect Asian men, that she’s unaware, or that she’s against you. If you start attacking her immediately and accusing her of those things, you’ll just push away anyone who could be helpful and sympathetic to your cause, and there is no conversation because she’ll never hear your insight.
What is lacking in Asian American culture is this mentorship between Asian men. Like people who are younger, but who are on the older end of younger who’ve gone through the whole 2nd generation thing. For them to reach out. I know what it was like to be 19. Because a lot of our immigrant parents can’t give us that. It’s not their fault. They just don’t know how to navigate this world and it’s not fair to expect them to do it.
In the comment threads, a lot of it depends on the initial comments because people don’t read articles. They respond to the headline, the photo, and they especially respond to other comments. So if those first initial comments are negative, it just becomes a pile-on and everybody starts ganging up. The people who do support you, they will probably be a lot more hesitant to say anything because they don’t want to get ganged up on either and it gets toxic so fast.